Imagination & Expectations

The content and form of my scribblings varies a lot. A good thing I hope, but why depends on several factors. Sometimes I use the blog as some kind of online diary, telling about everyday trivia such as haircuts and perfumes, and it's just that. Shorter hair and nice smell. Other times I have an urge to convey something really important to me, but instead of blurting it out I might disguise it inside a seemingly nonessential topic. Like haircuts and perfumes. So you never know, in fact I'm not sure if I always know myself! Sometimes I can read through a post later and realize I've revealed more of my inner thoughts than intended. The subconscious is playing tricks all the time... The point is it has to be up to the reader to make whatever they want out of what I write.

I feel I haven't been "together" for a long time now, and I guess my writing to some extent reflects that. In danger of appearing conceited I must admit that I'm occasionally get a little rush when I feel I've written something scintillating. And I must also say I haven't felt that rush in while. Feel most writing has been a little forced, but I'm sure it'll come back. I think it might have something to do with concentration and letting myself into the flow. Until my concentration span stretches beyond that of a Dobermann's I'll just send out (incoherent?) fragments of my scattered thoughts and reflections. Here's one:

I can only speak for myself, but this probably applies to more, if not everybody. The way we learn is through experience, we learn through our mistakes and successes. If something works we're bound to try to repeat it, but if it isn't what do we do then? We imagine what we want, we build an idea of how things should or could be. A machine or a piece of equipment is fine in that respect that it has no feelings, no life on its own. And we most of the time know what to expect out of it. People on the other hand are a totally different matter.

One thing is to imagine how things could be, another to actually believe a better outcome is possible. I think our expectations are based on what we have experienced so far, and those expectations might have a stronger impact on us than the images of what we really want have, and in that way our (subconscious) expectations are preventing us from progress.

Well, talk about being fragmentary! I'm not sure I manged to carry through even this little thought, it's like it's hanging mid air. I know I had some wonderful insights I wanted to share, but now they seem to be hiding somewhere again. It can't be helped, I'll press the publish post button anyway...