Same Old, Same Old

In short - I'm almost back where I was 3 years ago. Slightly more paid this time (which isn't a miracle since there was no money in it at all then). You know I've been looking for work, and as we all know it's not exactly a walk in the park for anyone. I've probably could have applied for even more than the ones I've done already, but I do the best I can for the moment. And I have even sent off applications to other places than Bergen! Let's see what destiny can do for my future...

But while waiting for that perfect job (or any job to be honest), there's not much cash coming in. There's a lot of criticism towards the officials, their inefficiency and lack of compassion, and then perhaps even more criticism of the people who are "lucky" enough to get anything from them. Well, I don't particularly share that view, against either. There are always the worst cases we hear about, and I believe they're doing a lot of good as well. One thing they have for example, for lets say someone in my position - a reasonably well educated and competent woman but without any confirmed work experience, which makes it hard to enter the market - is a program where an employer can take a person in "for free", following some sort of plan. The person (me in this case) will work as anyone else, getting valuable experience and references in return. As I said it's not well paid, but certainly a lot more than nothing, which is what I have now. And there are no obligations, the day I get a "proper" job I can go.

So where is this? It's a place where some of my interests and talents can be combined and hopefully put to proper use. It's the library at the Institute of Marine Research. Books and articles, computers, and fishy business - can it be better?

Crazy Cat

I wonder if my cat is trying to tell me something?

I left the laptop open while I went to the kitchen to cook me some dinner. (A fabulous Chili by the way...) Less than half an hour later I returned to the living room, and it was clear that the cat had been sticking her nose into my business again. She'd been poking around my laptop, and had managed to disconnect me from the Internet after she'd first opened up the same page in a new tab - 27 times! It was the Firefox Support page, and there was a big orange square staring at me:

"What do you need help with?" followed by a search box.

Excellent question, kitten! What is it that I do need help with? Maybe it's about time I figured that out...

Another thing; I might have some positive news one of these days. I'll tell you as soon I get a definitive Yes.

Boys And Their Mothers

I'm a mother; and I have a son. Until now I really haven't troubled myself with whether my relationship with him is good or not. Basically 'cause I feel it is good. But a good relationship between mother and son doesn't necessarily mean that the boy will do fine with other women later in his life. In fact, it can be the opposite. But if my son fails, somehow its' my fault, and I just hope it's not too late.

The reason for these thoughts is that my son is now engaged, and this lovely young girl will hopefully be in our lives for an infinite future. Suddenly I saw myself as the mother (-in law), and it all came together. The men I've known (and still know) have all been little boys, they're all someone's son. I see know my challenge as a mother is not only bringing my son up, setting examples, giving him values, but also teaching him to let go. It's said that boys look for someone like his mother (and girls for someone like her father), and that's all good, provided he once he finds that special woman really lets her in as "the First Lady". From then on she should be the one cooking the best meatballs.

He should also be strong enough to take his woman's side whenever there's an argument, or conflict of interest. It's almost impossible to win the competition against a mother-in-law; therefore, ideally, there shouldn't be one. The mother can do her part by accepting and welcoming the new member to the family, but it's up to the son to cut the cord.

I remember one episode, that really hurt my feelings. Of course, I can see both sides. To some degree I can understand the outburst from my in-laws. (My mother-in-law was the one upset, and my father-in-law took the job yelling at me.) But I also know in my heart that they handled the thing badly, and they had completely misunderstood my intentions. Anyway, the point here is not what happened, but the fact that my husband took their side without asking. I felt that he was more embarrassed on my behalf than anything else, and leaving me on my own like that wasn't the most courageous thing he could have done. Well, enough about him. I didn't tell this to out him or anything, merely wanted to share a feeling. A feeling I can only hope my son will never give a reason for his girl to have.

So boys, hope I didn't offend you too much. And if you feel blamed in any way, you're more than welcome to jump back at me. I know I probably have my own share of father issues...