Perspectives

Funny how the view can change so dramatically. Most people one time or another dream about winning big at the Lottery. Some do it to the extent that it's almost embarrassing, they're more talking of when and not if they're going to win. I must admit I too have been dreaming about zillions of dollars, but I'm not a hard gambler so to speak.

My little fantasy around what to do with an indecent amount of money wasn't so much about what to buy, as it was about how long could I keep the secret for. (Keep it from my husband, that was) I laid all these plans, about building up the tension only to make the surprise even bigger. I would have started with buying some expensive underware. Not delicate ones for me, but more like spending way too much on ordinary black socks with a silly brand name on for him. He would have hated it, telling me not to squander so much. To make the story shorter I'll just tell you that the finale would have been to bring him down to the marina and present him with a key to his dreamboat.

Reflecting now on this some 15 year old memory it strikes me that I didn't consider that much what I would have wanted for myself, I only wanted to make him happy. Teasing him a little bit of course, but still, I dreamt about seeing his face when he realized that we were stinking rich.

So what do I dream about now? Have I started to care bout my own needs? Oh, absolutely. If I won the Lottery I could continue my travel into the world of knowledge without having to worry about the student loan anymore. I don't need that much else, really, and the rest could the children get.

Or maybe just a little boat...



Red Boat with Blue Sails by Odilon Redon